The Daily Diatribe Edition 1: Why Nitish Kumar should be lauded for his sex ed masterclass
Like all great thinkers, Nitish is condemned to be free.
Hello and welcome to The Daily Diatribe: a daily blog of my most unedified thoughts. Recently, when the world and its uncle assumed Amartya Sen had passed away, Suman Ghosh, a filmmaker/economist, who directed The Argumentative Indian shared an interesting anecdote: Sen often stays up late at night writing things, much of which remains unpublished. He does so to clear his thoughts, especially on topics he doesn’t understand. Like Sen, I too often am beleaguered by many thoughts, and I write to clear my head of demons, but they are far more mischievous than Titivillus. The Daily Diatribe is just a small attempt at exorcising the said demons.
It’s one of the universe’s abiding myths that great men and women are never respected, at least not in their time.
A Jewish man – who pulled off a real miracle by being the only white person in the Middle East – was crucified for preaching love and compassion.
The Wright Brothers faced a lot of scorn for suggesting that man could take to the skies.
A Swiss patent clerk was mocked for questioning Newton’s understanding of the universe.
Galileo, whose struggles are often evoked in Bhojpuri songs, was forced to abjure the truth that earth wasn’t at the centre of the universe.
JK Rowling was cancelled for pointing out that biological sex is real.
And now, Bihar CM Nitish Kumar – the man who has switched alliances so often that it’s impossible to predict his position and momentum at the same time – is in hot water for his candid remarks on population control, which should’ve been viewed as a clear attempt to impart sex education.
Nitish – who has has been sworn in 8 times (so far) as the Chief Minister of Bihar, truly epitomizes Lenin when he said politics was the art of the possible – while batting for more reservations, waded into the one topic Indian politicians are never allowed to discuss: coitus. Even coitus interruptus.
Speaking in a candid manner, which news agency PTI called a “vivid description” of coitus interruptus (my words, not PTI’s), Nitish Kumar was hauled over the coals by his former allies and officers of quasi-judicial bodies that have so much free time that they often send out notices to people for sharing memes.
To be fair, all Nitish Kumar said was: “When an educated girl gets married, she can help in population control through her knowledge by telling her husband how to practice safe sex.”
The CM went to point out that the fertility rate (in Bihar) had come down to 2.9 from 4.3 due to growing literacy.
While critics – many who haven’t had the breeding or privilege to grow up with ecclesial classics that critic Brahminical patriarchy like Pandeyji Ka Beta or Lollipop Lagelu – took offence, true Biharis understood the real nature of Nitish Kumar’s remarks. The defence from his deputy CM – which was more solid than anything we’ve seen him deliver during his dry IPL stint with Delhi Daredevils – was that Nitish Kumar was just preaching population control.
Coitus interruptus (colloquially known as the pullout method) might not be as effective as condoms or other forms of conception, it’s still more effective than not doing anything (it has a 4% error rate).
Of course, it’s ironic because most folks arguing for strict action against Nitish Kumar for his remarks belong to a team that has a history of misogynist comments hither-tither like calling female opponents Shurpanakha, blaming women in live-in relationships for the acts of a heinous murderer, asking female politicians to go cook, or even taking offence to women drinking beer in jeans. Not to mention half the comments that have been directed at a female parliamentarian about her alleged dating life.
And lest we forget, this is the party that worships at the altar of the demagogue that has coined feminist slogans like Rs. 50 crore girlfriend (at Sunanda Pushkar), Rs 10,000 crore dowry (for Sonia Gandhi) or the infamous Didi O’ Didi remark (for Mamata Banerjee).
Of course, a slip by a political opponent can’t be missed, as the PM accused his former ally of having no “sharm”. However, if Nitish did want to come into the NDA fold again, one’d imagine there’d be no “sharm” in taking him back.
The matter of the fact is that as far as sexist remarks are concerned no party in India – including the ones helmed by women – can claim to have written a PhD thesis on intersectional feminism (it’s a different matter that no one should).
However, the irony is that while most remarks about women have been degrading, Nitish Kumar, in his own rustic way, was battling for women’s empowerment. The matter of the fact is that even if one moves away from the language the Chief Minister used, what he said is factually sound. There are numerous studies which show that there is a correlation between higher literacy rates in women and dip in fertility. A more educated woman is likely to have more agency and more say about her reproduction rights.
Alas, Indian politics is simply not mature enough to respect a woman’s agency and Nitish Kumar will be castigated for saying something every mature person ought to say. Sadly, like many of his intellectual peers, including Jesus, Einstein and Galileo, Nitish is also condemned to live knowing that he’s surrounded by brutes and ignoramuses.
P.S.: As an aside, his more important announcement, that Bihar would now have 75% reservation, was lost in the din and caste will certainly be a big trope in the upcoming Lok Sabha election as the INDI Alliance looks to use Mandal to battle Kamandal.
Mini Diatribes
1) Mad Max
Glen Maxwell played one of the most remarkable ODI innings yesterday as he scored 201 of 128 balls to break a plethora of records and inspire a million LinkedIn posts, but what is really bewildering is why the Afghan bowlers kept bowling to his legs when he was clearly cramped up and unable to move. Of course, it’s much easier to give be a sofa critic and the brain does stop working when someone starts belting you all over the park and that’s why I write on Substack.
2) The Return of Lokpal
Lokpal, the quasi body which everyone stopped thinking about when the BDSM enthusiast teetotaller decided to stop fasting, has ordered a CBI probe against Mahua Moitra. Clearly, misogyny is the order of the day in a country where women can’t even carry a Louis Vuitton bag without being harassed. Also, it’s sad that a party headed by a vocal female leader is so quiet about the entire thing.
On the other hand, perhaps the LinkedIn lesson here is that writing NYT op-eds or becoming Brut’s favourite viral sensation does have some consequences.
3) Black Lives Matter
Meanwhile, in a reminder that Black Lives Matter is needed more than ever – despite their support for hand gliders and Hamas – from Bareilly, where a man with a dark complexion was burnt to death by his wife in 2017. The woman was charged with life imprisonment.
4) India’s Rosa Parks
And finally, a shoutout to India’s Rosa Parks (or as SNL calls her “uppity bus b****”.
Najma Parveen, a Muslim scholar from Varanasi who completed her PhD India’s prime minister, titled ‘Narendra Modi’s Political Leadership: An Analytical Study’, from the department of political science of Banaras Hindu University (BHU). She said: “I selected this topic as PM Narendra Modi created a model of development as the chief minister of Gujarat. His popularity grew and he became the prime minister of the country. The 2014 general elections transformed the entire political landscape of the country. The Bharatiya Janata Party’s victory considerably reduced the influence of regional parties in national politics. As prime minister, Modi started working in a dynamic manner and took several decisions for the development of the country and welfare of the poor. That is why I chose this topic.”
Given what happened to the Muslim woman who was thrown out by her husband for making Modi-Yogi paintings in Uttar Pradesh’s Balia, or the man crushed under an SUV by a Mirzapur cab passenger for raising objections against his cabbie’s Travis Bickle-like rant against Modi-Yogi, one has to admire her gumption.
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